On Saturday, February 21, I turned 28 years old.  It was an uneventful day, to say the least.  No party, no birthday cards from my husband or kids, no one sung “Happy Birthday” (until Sunday), and the cake I made was terrible.  My friend Amy (who did get me a card, Thank You very much for that, it was great) watched the kids so Daniel and I could go out for dinner.  We went to a place we’d never been before.  I would not recommend doing this on your birthday.  Go with what you know.  The food was not that great and actually made me feel sick to my stomach.  We came straight home and I read a book until 4AM.  It was sad.

On the other hand, Daniel got me a Nintendo DS and a couple of fun games.  I’ve been wanting one for a while now.  My mom bought me the 4 books I wanted.  Plus, I got great cards from my parents, sister, grandma and Amy (as I mentioned earlier).  I’m grateful that we had the money to go out to dinner and for me to get a nice gift.  I’m grateful that I have my health.  It was not the worst birthday I’ve ever had.  That goes to my 19th birthday.  I spent it being 38 weeks pregnant with a stomach virus, spewing out of both ends and having contractions b/c I was getting dehydrated.

Getting older is great, it means you’re alive.  My hair is turning gray, but that’s ok.  It’s nice, thick hair.  I haven’t started to wrinkle and probably won’t for a while.  I stay out of the sun and have good genes.  I’m still young enough to enjoy my kids.  They are a great joy even if they bug me sometimes. 

So, here’s to being 28.  Let’s hope it’s a great years.

I have been on antidepressents for almost 8 years.  My first drug was Lexapro, 10mg a day.  After a few months, Wellbutrin XL 150mg a day was added.  For those that don’t know, Lexapro is an SSRI (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors).  It helps fix your serotonin levels.  Wellbutrin is a DARI (Dopamine Reuptake Inhibitors).  It helps fix your dopamine levels.  My doctor said that when you start an SSRI and your serotonin levels go up, that your dopamine levels start to drop.  This is why I take both.  Over the years, my dosages went up, 40mg of Lexapro and 300mg of Wellbutrin XL.  They worked wonderfully.  After I had my second child in 2007, I had to start taking Zoloft (and ONLY Zoloft) because my insurance company had changed it’s policy about certain drugs.  After a few months on Zoloft, I knew it wasn’t working the way I needed it to work.  I had my doctor put me on Celexa (40mg), which he said was very close to Lexapro.  He also put me back on Wellbutrin XL (300mg).  I had to pay $66 for a 3 month supply of the Wellbutrin, but it was worth it.  The Celexa was only $9 for 3 months worth.  Slowly but surely, things got back to the way it was before.  Thank goodness that, now, I can get my meds for free at the Naval Hospital. 

So, the reason I’ve said all this is because I ran out of my Celexa about 12 days ago and haven’t been able to get my refill.  Not until tomorrow.  I hadn’t realized how much this medication helps me out.  I thought I would be ok with just the Wellbutrin, but nooooo.  I have been on edge, very irritable, angy for no reason, crying for no reason, feeling like I need to beat the crap out of something (or someone) and just not wanting to be aroud any other people.  Now I know that it really does work and that I really do need it.  My poor husband has been getting most of my “additude”, thank goodness he undestands.

Tomorrow can’t come soon enough.  Lets hope it doesn’t take too long for my chemicals to get back in order.